I'd Rather Eat a Dried Sea Cucumber

I'm convinced the old "early to bed, early to rise" adage is a load of crap. I HATE waking up early. There is something about getting out of bed before 8:45 that is physically painful to me. It ruins my whole day - I never really wake up, I can't stop yawning, I have really bad coordination, I start saying really dumb stuff, and so on and so forth - all in all it's not good for me to be out in public when I'm tired. In fact when I do make myself get up, whoever I see while I'm driving genuinely pisses me off. Because the fact that other people get up before 8 a.m. makes it so I have to as well.
But I didn't always used to be this way. When I was in high school I had two-a-day swim practices and I woke up at 4:40 a.m. every morning to get to practice by 5 a.m. - it was brutal but as soon as my alarm went off I hopped up out of bed and got my suit on. Now I was not fully alert and I had to mentally remind myself that I could take a nap later that day in order to calm my weary body, but I did it. In addition to swim practice, I also had three years of early morning seminary (I moved to Utah my senior year so I had release time seminary for a year), and I was really good about getting up, getting ready for school and getting to seminary on time. But now I just can't do it, unless I have to catch a flight or I have something really important to go to, I would rather eat a dried sea cucumber than get up early.
For example, today I was supposed to go to the Legislature in Salt Lake for one of my journalism classes. We were supposed to meet at the Marriot center at 7:30 a.m and we had to look nice so I set my alarm for 6 a.m. I had a lot of homework to do the night beofre so I didn't get to bed until after one, but I was sure I would be able to force myself to get to that van in the morning.
Well 6 a.m. came, my alarm went off, I made myself get up, I walked to my closet, put on my robe and slippers and then I thought to myself, "I can't do this. I am going to die if I make myself stay awake, and I'll ask really stupid questions when I interview people in the Legislature because I'll be too tired to talk or think coherently." So I took off my slippers, left my robe on, just for good measure, went back to bed and slept until 9 a.m. like I do every morning.
I really just couldn't get up, it's embarrassing, but it's true. But you know what? I am not ashamed that I am not a morning person, I don't want to be. Where's the fun in getting up before the sun comes up and feeling that rush of sluggishness sweep your body the minute you open your eyes? It is so repugnant to me that it makes me shudder just thinking about it - I never want to have a job or a lifestyle that requires me to be up at ungodly hours of the morning. I am NOT a morning person.